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  • Writer's pictureJudith Pinkerton

To BE or not to BE

I sometimes wonder before leaping into a new world, do I need to BE or ACT? Do I follow what others are BEing to part of the new crowd, or do I ACT like myself, BEing true to myself?

So I drilled down farther to understand more about being authentic. Do I resort to automatic responses or am I authentic and possess these 7 common characteristics that show I am psychologically mature and fully functioning as a human being?

  1. Have realistic perceptions of reality.

  2. Are accepting of themselves and of other people.

  3. Are thoughtful.

  4. Have a non-hostile sense of humor.

  5. Are able to express their emotions freely and clearly.

  6. Are open to learning from their mistakes.

  7. Understand their motivations.

I discovered this is what it means to be true to myself which is my innate desire.

Then, I found these 7 characteristics are typical of what unauthentic (artificial or automatic) people do or BE which is NOT BEing true to myself.

  1. Are self-deceptive and unrealistic in their perceptions of reality.

  2. Look to others for approval and to feel valued.

  3. Are judgmental of other people.

  4. Do not think things through clearly.

  5. Have a hostile sense of humor.

  6. Are unable to express their emotions freely and clearly.

  7. Are not open to learning from their mistakes.

  8. Do not understand their motivations.

I discovered further that an unauthentic person will say and do things that are defensive with a self-deceptive approach to life. That, no matter how passionate and committed they are to a cause, ultimately they are not being true to themselves.

I'm taking all of this to heart as I navigate life in new worlds,

staying in my lane, honoring others - and myself.

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